New mind/ new beginning

3 little boys in a Camper-van  Joel, Thomas and James were normally healthy babies.  Joel and James hit all of their milestones until approximately 18 months.  Joel stopped talking at around about the age of 18 months, Thomas never really babbled once he started walking it was as if that became his focus. James on the other hand stopped talking at about the same time as his eldest brother Joel but then began talking again.  All three boys have autism.  We always struggled with going out to restaurants.  Many times people would glare at us as our child screamed or threw food around.  However it gradually became harder and harder to get Joel and Thomas into a restaurant like McDonalds, so the drive thru was a godsend.  Eating picnics in the car was ok but it was cramped and when we had to also carry special needs buggies for both children the car became even more so then there were the nappy changes that needed to happen, having to get them...

Becoming a new you: Embrace who you are - support groups really helped me with this.  I now have a group of friends with tourettes who get me.  We sit in a bar and can be who we are rather than who we think we should be. I could tell you about where this feeling of needing to conform comes from, but I want to press forward. I have looked back to improve my understanding of who I am and to put past hurts away to prevent them from holding me back. Be careful not to set unattainable goals - (e.g) why did I make that mistake? From now on I'll not talk to anyone for example then no one can upset me won't help as it is not attainable but just sets us up to fail and keeps us in the cycle of anxiety. I want to break that cycle of anxiety but some days I just can't it is good to have all of this good advice in my head but useless if you are not in the right place to use it.  This has been the case for me many times. One pitfall to becoming a new you is expecting all of t...

The challenges of being parents to 3 gorgeous boys with autism. A difficult Saturday morning preceded by a week of full on challenges with our 3 children.  Half term was the week before.  Our other 2 children had come home from school for their half term.  My wife is amazing as she has had to deal with the boys all week without respite.  I however have been at work able to escape.  By 9am on  a Saturday morning I am already craving alcohol.  Hence the need for an Irish coffee.  During the first Monday of half term I had already found Gin. I mean I'd heard of it but suddenly took more of an interest in it.  I went to my local supermarket and contemplated what I needed to buy to keep my wife and I both sane.  That was four bottles of beer, ready made cans of gin mixed with a plethora of different tonics. Feeling sophisticated I also picked up some ready mixed Pims and lemonade. A friend suggested that I should have cleared the entire ...

As the title suggests I have a diagnosis of Dyspraxia and Tourettes.  I have overcome many challenges and want to give you the tools to do the same. Struggles in concentration, short term memory. Tools  Dictaphone, laptop, talking software for dictation and to turn words into text, and headphones. DWP access to work provide a grant to fund equipment and coaching Reasonable adjustments by the employer. The Equality Act 2010. Think of the power of broke, to succeed you have to be hungry for success and willing to go through anything to succeed.  This a paraphrase from the book entitled the power of broke.  It is about success in business however I think it equally applies to other situations in life. Situations and other people don't stop you succeeding only you can do that. That said, it is good to list your strengths and opportunities as it is easy to forget what you are good at and yes despite our view of ourselves we all have a lot to give to an empl...

On the train home now with my wife and our eldest son.  We've had a busy trip to London.  Pizza hut, the theatre, dropping to the floor a fee times when the world became too scary.  Too many people, too much noise bit he coped very well. His first trip to London without a buggy and our first to Pizza Hut with him. Walking to the sound of let me shine  An amazing song sung by other children with autism from Priors Court School. Recorded at Abbey Road last year.   "I am not broken, I am unique all I want is for you to believe in me. One step at a time, stand next to me walk by my side you and I are friends for life.  Accept me for who I am and let me shine, let me shine.  This he played wherever we went. Even the bird ladies in the Lion King performance danced to the beat and enjoyed the words  of this song. We will continue to spread awareness.

In my previous blog I talked of my children having autism. The challenges posed.  We fought hard to get two of our sons into a educational setting that can meet there needs.  I'm pleased to say that after 13 months at Priors Court School  they are doing amazingly.  Both are happy at school, they are provided with a 24hr curriculum.  The older boys are home for the holidays.  It is very challenging in terms of needing to keep a close eye on all 3 and 2 boys toilet training at the sametime is a worthwhile challenge. Our middle child also has PICA a condition where he eats non food things. (Including glass, dog faeces, mum, poisonous plants etc)  It is a constant battle to take things out of his mouth as he is very quick. I know every local authority has budget constraints but every child matters and deserves an opportunity to thrive regardless of their disability.   None of the local authority schools could provide the required environmen...

Takes courage.  Courage is a process not an achievement.  My fears are not there to hold me back but keep me safe.  However sometimes they are there for no reason except a programmed response. Other people do not make me feel a certain way, rather it is my response to those situations or people that make me feel as negatively. So far day 2 (yesterday)was challenging. I was unable to enact my new mindset I had learned.  Today my wife and I are taking our eldest to London to see the Lion King at an autism friendly showing.  He loved it last time. With iPad, snacks, a change of clothes for our son and nappies we are on the train.  He looks so excited playing Lion King music on his iPad.  My dad and step mum are looking after our other two children.  Yay I feel so happy to spend the day with our eldest. An exciting adventure feels like a day off.